The Breakup Song Extravaganza

This has been a few days in the making, but now that I'm back in the mood for breakup songs, I can finally write this.

So have you been dumped lately? Good, because if you were the dumper this list is not for you. I mean, I have those songs, but today we don't want to listen to those because here, you are not in control. She just doesn't love you anymore, he needs space, or maybe you just aren't "the one". Maybe you were the one, but they changed their mind. Yeah, life bites like that. Now you're just standing there, feeling like something is crumbling inside of you, wondering why you feel so numb, waiting to get home so you can cry your feelings into a pint of ice cream (regardless of gender). I know Greg Behrendt says to put away that ice cream, but I'll let you have it because I know how that feels and sometimes ice cream and some sad music are just what you need.

If anyone, anyone at all, tells you that you shouldn't have any time to mope, fuck their shit up and go spend a day inside your covers. Everyone, doesn't matter who, needs at least one day to cry and reminisce and sob out loud, "Why me? I thought everything was going so well!" After that one day, though, you get up out of your Bed of Sadness and start living again. Before you ask, no, I have not had my one day yet, and I think it just might be today.

Now that we have that in order, it's time to figure out your Official Breakup Playlist. If you think you don't need this, just try to keep those tears going without some horribly sad fuel and then get back to me. I'm giving you one day, so you better get it all out now so you don't break down in the line at the bank or something.

I know not everyone shares my taste in music, despite the fact that I listen to everything, so these are just my personal recommendations. But lemme tell you, they are tested, tried and true, and they work damn well for all of your broken-up needs.

Now you can listen as you read along!!

• First of all, country music produces some of the saddest music ever. I don't care if you think country music is for hillbillies and rednecks, you cannot deny that their breakup music is moving. Some of it is angry, some of it is refreshing, but most of it is fucking sad. If you want some music that is guaranteed to make you cry, start here.
• On that note, Lee Ann Womack has some great hits. I like "Does My Ring Burn Your Finger", "I May Hate Myself In The Morning", "Someone I Used To Know", "A Little Past Little Rock", "Why They Call It Falling", and "Painless". If you can get her version of "Ashes", DO IT.
• "Miss Me Baby" by Chris Cagle. If you don't have this song, you're missing out on some primo sobbing time. It is perfect.
• "Neon Moon" by Brooks and Dunn is pretty good. Nice and slow, melancholy, kinda depressing. "That Ain't No Way To Go" is great as well.
• "I Can Still Feel You" by Collin Raye. A little upbeat but it works. A song all about how they never go away? How do you not add that?
• I'm a sap, so I have "Tonight I Wanna Cry" by Keith Urban on mine. Slow, sad, all about how you just want to cry because everything is too hard. Sappy, again, but goddamn it gets the job done. DO NOT listen to this song while you're walking around in public. You will break down and have to find a convenient bathroom stall to cry in. Keep it to your room.
• "Bring Me Down" by Miranda Lambert is beautiful and sad. "Sweet like a kiss, sharp like a razor blade, I find you when I'm close to the bottom..." Don't pass this one up.
• However, the ultimate song that I put on repeat is: "Settle for a Slowdown" by Dierks Bentley. Gender doesn't matter here - this song is perfect. They left you and all you want is for them to just show that they just might miss you. All you're asking for is a slowdown. It's depressing and perfect for a sobfest under your covers.
• There are plenty more country songs, but these are just my favorites. Particularly that last one. Trust me, country music is a goldmine of any and all breakup songs that you need.

Moving on past country music....

• You remember how I said "Bouncing Ball" by honeyhoney was that indie song they play after everything's gone to hell and you're watching everyone stumble around all sad and contemplative? Turns out it's great for breakups too.
• "You Could Be Happy" by Snow Patrol. If you don't believe me, listen to it and then come here and tell me it doesn't work. In fact, there's a lot of Snow Patrol songs that are perfect. This one is just my favorite.
• The old-school fave, "Don't Speak" by No Doubt.
• "You Are Goodbye" by Holly Conlan. Folky and acoustic-y.
• "Favorite" by Lex Land works regardless of gender. If you are of the female persuasion, try "As Much As You Lead". It will not disappoint.
• "Lo Imprescindible" by Shakira. You know what, shut up, I freaking love Shakira, and this is a dark song about how important it is for someone to come back. So listen to it and then shut up.
• If you really want to be angry, "You Oughta Know" will always be perfect. Warning: it only really works if you're female.
• "Wreck of the Day" by Anna Nalick will always, always be appropriate.
• "Back at Your Door" by Maroon 5. Also "Goodnight Goodnight", but I'm iffy on that one. The former is great, though.
• "Where I Stood" by Missy Higgins. Shut up, it's good.
• "Clean and Sober" by Anya Marina. Oh my god, this song. It may not make you cry, but it's still got that ring of, "oh my god, this is my life."
• Whatever anyone says, "I Can't Make You Love Me" by Bonnie Raitt is fucking gold. If you know it (and you should), you'll understand. If you don't, what the hell is wrong with you?!
• Carole King's "Will You Love Me Tomorrow?"
• I guarantee that "How to Save a Life" by the Fray will make you cry like a baby. I guarantee.
• "Papercuts" by Gym Class Heroes is good, albeit not for the "I want to sob in my bed like the world is ending" subset.
• For the ladies in the room: "Dumb Girls" by Lucy Woodward is angry and sad and self-deprecating. Listen and enjoy.
• "I'm The Only One" by Melissa Etheridge. This song will never not be perfect. Play it over and over and belt it out from your bed. Not only is it fitting, it is angry and sad! Bonus!
• "Goodbye to You" by Michelle Branch is great if you are super sappy.
• Unknown: "Before the Worst" by the Script. All about how you wish you could go back before everything started fucking up and just stay in that happy place.
• I personally have "Lullaby" by Shawn Mullins and "If It Makes You Happy" by Sheryl Crow on my playlist, but the former is my general depression song and the latter fits the circumstances. Still great songs, though.
• Ooh, try out "Like You, Only Sweeter" by William Tell and then let me know what you think. Nice rebound song.
• "Reason Why" by Rachael Yamagata. Just... listen to it.
• Another one that is actually kind of a happy song but can be corrupted to a sad one given the circumstances: "Universe & U" by KT Tunstall. I have the acoustic version, so bonus!
• "Hopelessly Devoted to You". Yeah I love Grease, shut up. If you can find something even better, show me.
• Oh, I take it back - "Without You" from Rent. Yeah. Try not crying at that song. Or even "I'll Cover You Reprise". Oh my god, that song.

I probably have more, but these are what's on repeat over here in Dom's-heart-is-breaking Land. "The Trouble With Love Is" by Kelly Clarkson is a staple, maybe "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls if you're really masochistic, but other than that, this list hits all the basic needs.

WARNING: DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES listen to "your" songs. That is not what we want here. Yes, they'll make you cry, but we want sad songs about what you're going through. Avoid those songs like the plague until you can stomach them again.

You know what? I'll post the playlist.com version of what I could find here, and anything that's not here, you'll have to find elsewhere and verify how amazing it is.

Good luck on your brokenheartedness. I'm getting back to my comfy bed and early weekend before everything gets worse than it already is.

Live from the Student Center Computer Lab!

I was just at the student Starbucks (shut up) listening to a guy play guitar and various percussion instruments live. Yeah, I know, it sounds like a standard coffeehouse staple, but he didn't sound like your standard Starbucks music fare. Probably because he was brought in by our University Programs group, but just stick with me here.

His name is Doug Wood and he spent a lot of time performing on the streets in Boston, making a living off of that, which I have to give him super kudos for because I cannot imagine living like that. Well, I can, but it's mostly influenced by Rent and some other miscellaneous movies about people who play guitar on the streets (like a very specific movie that I'm thinking of but cannot remember the name of it. It had a great soundtrack and was about this Irish guy and a Bulgarian or Romanian or Hungarian woman meeting in Dublin, but the woman had a husband back in the former-Soviet country she was from, but they fell in love anyway, and it's all there in the music, and if you remember what that movie is I will reward you in some way that is yet unspecified. Possibly cookies).

Anyway, back to what I was trying to say. He has the clear markings of "street performer who plays guitar" and it shows, but that's good in my book. He's very chill and makes jokes and slightly self-deprecating. He also has this vague Celtic-y vibe in his music, which would usually scare me away but I rather like it here. It's not all new-agey and overbearing, like other Celtic-types who are all, "I worship the waning and waxing of the moon because the Goddess lives within her and she is the Goddess and we are all one with nature," which gives me the urge to take a bat to someone's head (not in small part because that music also gives me a headache). No, his Celtic-y sound is more like, "I heard this and tried it out, and it worked, but I limited it. Also, wanna grab a coffee later?", which is a lot more inviting and chill. It's a lot easier to handle than "I dance around in my backyard naked chanting poems to the Lady while playing this song". (<----way intimidating and a good way to scare me off of a CD forever) He also has a song he plays called "The George of the Jungle Jam". Seriously. And it's fun and bouncy and has lots of percussion. How can you not like it? Seriously, though, he definitely knows his way around a guitar. He actually tries out a lot of things with it that impresses me because it just sounds so good. I don't know how else to say it without sounding horribly cheesy and cliched, but honestly, the chords were surprising but went well together and if he had just played the guitar, even without all of the excellent percussion he did, I still would have been mighty impressed. As it stands, I am plus-one approving. Here's a clip so you can get a feel for his music:

The only problem I personally have with this kind of music is that, while I love it live, I don't usually buy it because I have little patience with it when I'm listening to recorded music. Yeah, it's picky, but it's just the way I am. I'd have to get used to listening to it recorded before I could buy it or really think about buying it, actually. Nevertheless, I really enjoyed the free coffehouse jam and I'd like to hear more from this artist, so Doug Wood, if you're Googling yourself (like me) and you come across this blog, I was the chick in the back of Starbucks at Alabama knitting and applauding and you were fantab.

Blog-wise: tonight I'll probably post a new blog about breakup music and my selections, because let's face it, everyone needs a breakup playlist on their iPod just in case (look how handy mine came in, after all). Have a good afty and I'll see you tonight.

Snark: Get Off of My Lawn, You Crazy Kids, Or I'll Get the Hose!

David Denby, a critic for The New Yorker, has written a book decrying (what else?) snark, entitled Snark: It's Mean, It's Personal, and It's Ruining Our Conversations. From what I can tell, mostly he confuses actual honest-to-goodness snark with trolling. So well done there, Mr. Denby.

However, since I really don't feel like wasting what precious money I have on a book that will tell me all about how I and my generation are destroying people's conversations and Internet experiences worldwide, I'll let Adam Sternbergh of the New York Magazine tell you what he thinks instead. Magically, and resisting the urge that clearly I cannot, he refrains from any snark on the book whatsoever and engages in a serious and honest tone about defining snark.

Sorry, Mr. Denby - I'll always hold a special place for Fandom Wank in my heart, and no clueless but crotchety author will sway that. I'll get off of your lawn now, there's no need to swing your cane at me so menacingly.

Another reason why I love Katie White

According to Wikipedia, the Ting Tings' song "Impacilla Carpisung" in sung in Simlish.

*worships* Katie, you don't know how absofuckinglutely amazing you are. Rock on.

Grotesque - who is the real monster?

Nowadays, the trend is to write books in which "we", the humans and/or the side that seems sympathetic at first, are the true monsters of society. Damn, we can go back to Mary Shelley's Frankenstein and see the beginnings of a whole new theme that would soon be co-opted by a politician talking about the polar ice caps (although I doubt Shelley saw that coming). We are the monsters. Alternatively, it could be that the author is performing a clever shell con on us - while they make much attention in one particular character, it is another one that truly possesses ugliness.

Natsuo Kirino achieves this in her novel Grotesque, but with one major difference: many if not all of the main characters are true monsters.

Grotesque is a novel fascinated with the difference and blurred lines between beauty and ugliness. We are led through most of the book by an unnamed narrator who isn't even referred to by so much as her last name (interesting, especially considering that this was originally written in Japanese). Instead, she is merely, "Yuriko's older sister, " or "Yuriko's sister". She resents it, but believes herself to be better than her sister because Yuriko is a monster.

Yuriko has always been a stunningly beautiful girl. From childhood, when people thought she looked like a doll and she "stirred men's Lolita complex", to youth, where she was admitted to a prestigious high school for girls simply because she was beautiful, she has always possessed this beauty - even as an adult, she is a prostitute and admits that she is a nymphomaniac. She has never seen any reason to help anyone else out because she knows they'll take care of her. As a fading prostitute, she gets business here and there.

Until she is brutally murdered at the age of 37.

Yuriko's older sister isn't sad, surprised, or shaken at all - she hated her sister and envied her all at the same time. She maintains that she always knew Yuriko would get killed like that, so who cares? At the same time, she seems angry at the press for ignoring Yuriko's death. She says bitterly that it's all because Yuriko was only a prostitute - and who cares about another dead hooker? The way she turns from calling Yuriko a monster to sharply berating the newspapers for not talking about Yuriko more startles the reader, but makes us curious. Why is she like this? What did Yuriko do to her?

Kazue Sato is the third girl in the tragedy. She too has become a prostitute - all the more baffling because she is a successful, intelligent business woman working for a prestigious firm in Tokyo. She, like the narrator and Yuriko, attended Q School for Young Women. But where Yuriko naturally became popular because of her incredible looks, the narrator and Kazue were outsiders in an insider's paradise. The narrator brushes it off and says it wasn't worth it (words that are later called into question by the climax of the book), but Kazue was desperate to fit in. She tries everything she thinks of, but is just too normal for these privileged, rich girls.

Of all the characters, I identified with Kazue the best. She really was just a normal girl, growing up in a normal household. Her father doted on her and told her that if she wanted to do something, all she had to do was work hard and try her best. She wrote herself encouraging notes while studying for the Q School entrance exams. She only wanted to fit in and have friends.

The narrator, however, has other plans. Kazue, according to her, clamped onto her and wouldn't let go, so she decided to piss the stars right out of Kazue's eyes. She ridicules her for working hard, makes fun of her efforts and her family, and practically pisses all over Kazue's first crush.

That story in and of itself is telling. Kazue admits to the narrator that she has a crush on a boy named Takashi Kijima, who spends a lot of time with Yuriko. Since Yuriko is her sister, Kazue begs, couldn't she talk to Yuriko and find out what kind of girl he likes? The narrator senses an opportunity and mines it for all it's worth.

Kazue writes love letter after love letter to Kijima, asking the narrator eagerly to read them first. The narrator laughs at them behind her back, but graciously sends the most fervent ones on to Kijima. She tells a breathless Kazue that Kijima really likes a famous movie star, so he must like skinny girls. Kazue, a veritable twig, immediately frets aloud that she's too fat. The narrator slyly suggests that she cut back on the eating and trim herself up so that Kijima will finally like her - she'll be skinny, after all! Kazue subsequently develops both anorexia and bulimia, a habit that she never finds her way out of.

You see, Kazue is also violently murdered a year after Yuriko. Same way and allegedly the same man.

Kazue's life showed so much promise - so much more than the other two, so her ultimate fall is terrifying. Yuriko knew from an early age that all she wanted was to be desired and to have as much sex as she liked. Her sister was too wrapped up in her maliciousness (her "special talent", as she called it) to even contemplate the word promise. Kazue could have been so much more than what she was, and arguably she would have if only the narrator had not so wholeheartedly crushed and perverted her.

So do I recommend this book? Hell to the yes. Crime noir at its finest, it weaves in the Japanese dynamics between teenage girls, the sexes, and society so acutely it stings to read the brutal honesty in it sometimes. The ending is ambiguous and yet somehow obvious if you read between the lines. It is both beautful and ugly, much like the characters themselves. This is definitely on my new must-read list.

Do you like blues/folk/jazz/indie/all of the above? Then do we have a deal for you!

I bought honeyhoney's debut album (ugh, I can already feel the pretension coating me. "Debut album"? I fucking hate that term. Let's try that again) or rather, their first CD, First Rodeo today. Today was even one of those days that calls for a new album - the sky was clear, the sun was bright, it was brisk and coldish, I was humming tired old songs that I've overplayed horribly but still manage to love... you know those days. So anyway, I'd already seen the "Little Toy Gun" video and played it to unending repeat on iTunes (and somehow it never gets old!) and I felt it was probably time to invest in their CD.

Color me not disappointed. I am developing some serious feelings about this CD, and it's pretty safe to say that they're reciprocated and that I might get a prom date out of it.

So because this is easier, we'll take it track by track and break it down:

"Black Crows": Nice intro to the CD as a whole. The music (Ben Jaffe) is super-jazzy with more defined guitar and drum additions. So kinda jazz-piano-meets-upbeat-folk. The vocals (Suzanne Santo) are amazing. Kinda bluesy on this one, like folk if more folk singers had more power to their voices (I notice that they tend to be lacking on that front).

"Little Toy Gun": Oh, this song. Still my favorite song on the album. Upbeat, fun, and about a girl and her gun. You really can't go wrong with that combination! It's kind of poppy, but pop like the Raconteurs, not pop like Britney. It sounds like something that could infect the radio and nobody would complain.

"Sugarcane": Slower, quieter than the first two songs. The music is still on that folky kick with sharper drums. Suzanne sounds jazzy here. She reminds me of Norah Jones here, but (again) with more power to her voice. Norah's kind of wispy sometimes, but that's never a problem with Suzanne. She also has a lot of emotion in her voice - when she does the fun songs, you can tell she's getting into it, and with the slower ones she pours her heart into her voice.

"Not for Long": Sounds like something off of the Wreckers's CD (remember them? Michelle Branch's new project where she got all countrified?), but with a kick. Bluesy as all hell, it's about moving on and getting over someone. There is an honest-to-god fiddle in this song - not like a country fiddle or an Ocean Avenue fiddle, though, which makes it that much better. Short but sweet.

"Bouncing Ball": This sounds like one of those songs that plays in an indie movie after the main conflict has happened and we're watching a montage of the characters all doing their own thing, just brooding away, and we know that somehow they will all patch this up later. Trufax, guys. I love it and it's perfect to walk home to in the cold as the sun's about to set, but it really is that song. Think Juno where she's having that breakdown in her car after Mark was a douchebag. This song totally could have played there.

"Come On Home": More blues! I kind of love this blues-jazz-folk-indie-pop sound they have going on here. This song is blues/folk if Billie Holiday added her vocals.

"Give Yourself to Me": Got the same kind of upbeat vibe as "Little Toy Gun" with less of the radio-star vibe. It's fun and bouncy as hell, though. I could hear a more standard alternative band do this, but with less of the violin and acoustic guitar. Song is made for mad dancing in your bedroom.

"David": Quiet, quiet, quiet. Another Norah-esque song with that folky kick and rock-ballad drums. I like it and could see this hitting the indie market hard (if it hasn't already, I don't know, I don't keep up with that stuff very well).

"Slow Brains": Kinda sarcastic. More of that kind of Raconteurs sound, like "Steady As She Goes" but a little slower-paced (only a little). I'd describe the genre sound, but I have a feeling you have already guessed it and I hate to be repetitive.

"Under the Willow Tree": V. whimsical and with more of that jazz sound in the vocals. If it was sung against just a jazz piano, it could be sung in a jazz club or something to that effect. As it stands, with the muted piano and drums, it gives it another, somehow more friendly vibe.

" Oh Mama": Final track! Soulful and emotional, set against a piano and the barest hint of drums and an acoustic guitar that starts out way in the background but slowly takes over. She sounds so moving here, almost mournful, but it ends the CD well.

Go listen if you are into that whole indie-blues-folk sound, and even if you aren't, I'll bet you'll like "Little Toy Gun" and the accompanying video (which stars and was directed by Kiefer Sutherland. WTF? Don't worry, Kiefer, you'll always be Jack Bauer to me). If you hate that, well, you have no taste in music or perhaps you just don't want to try anything new, in which case you still suck.

Alright, I've spent too long breaking this down for y'all, and it is off to my normal life. My roommate has vacayed the room because I "type too loudly", apparently (wtf that means, I will probably never know), and my stomach is vying for my attention with loud grumbles like I just called its mother a whore or something. Enjoy your night/day/wherever it is where you are.

Standard introductory post should be here, I presume.

This is all my friend Petite's fault. He was the one who suggested I start a blog to dump all my critiques and reviews of all the things I like into one place because surely, he says, I will be a big hit!

Having been on the intarwebz before (albeit on LiveJournal), I sincerely doubt that, but at least nobody can say I didn't give it a shot.

Standard procedure is to give one's name and such, so here goes: My name is Dominique, but since that seems hard for many people to pronounce, I go by Dom. I'm twenty as of writing this and a something in college. Probably a sophomore. That sounds about right.

I enjoy just about everything, and if I don't it's because I gave it a fair try and discovered that it's really not worth my time. Mostly I try to be open-minded, but not so open-minded that my brain falls out. I like what I like and I'm very vocal about it. What I don't like varies between "It's just not my cup of tea" and "Dear God let me smash it with a hammer". I feel a compulsive need to always be the Deadpan Snarker in any ensemble I'm in. I read a lot and I'm very hands-on. Also, I love TV Tropes and have wasted endless hours (read: days) in that time-sucking void. I'm not complaining or anything, but it takes a lot to get me back out into reality after clicking a link over to there.

As for my more personal life, I have friends, a family, and a boyfriend. Pretty standard, although clearly I prefer them to any other issues. I have a roommate in one of those stereotype dorms, but we eschewed turning our beds into bunk beds and thus turning our room into something out of a summer camp. We live together, but we each have our separate lives and enjoy them quite nicely.

This blog isn't for me to gab away about my personal life, though. That's my business and, quite frankly, none of yours. Seriously, that's what Facebook is for. Here, I'm just going to be reviewing and opinioning all over the place, so if you're looking for some college girl sob story you will be very disappointed in me. I got tired of LiveJournal and talking about my omgsopersonal life. I'd rather talk about stuff here.

So, if it's something I can look at, listen to, taste, touch, or smell, I'll have an opinion on it. What can I say, I'm a girl who knows what she likes and what she doesn't.

That's pretty much it. I hate these types of posts because they always sound so different in my head, and also because it's so tedious talking about myself. Blah blah blah, whatever, on with the good stuff. First review of... something will be forthcoming later in the day, I'm sure.

Also: the blog name comes from a Bitter:Sweet song called Sugar Mama. And before you ask, yes, it is true.